We can be led to the crossroad but, in the final analysis, must travel on alone. Our personal passions and dreams are unique unto us.
Finding God; Where to Start Looking
God’s Dream Come True
Verna J. Dozier was a leading African American theologian and prophet who touched countless lives and transformed hearts. Her work and service were prolific. As a teacher and Board Member of Examining Chaplains, she often spoke and wrote about the dream of God.
She believed that we have the capacity to bring forth the realization of Howard Thurman’s vision of ‘a friendly world of friendly folk beneath a friendly sky’. She believed that God wants all creation to live together in peace, harmony, and fulfillment. She believed that we are called to restore that dream together. I believe she was right. In truth, how could it be otherwise?
The wounds and struggles of the past have the power to separate and destroy us. But they also have the power to move us forward to new life, a new identity, and universal oneness.
Our suffering is what we all have in common. It's not single-mindedness and strength that will overcome, but acceptance and shared vulnerability. The Dream of God is attainable if we are willing to let go of our chokehold on yesterday by engaging in healing here and now. We can start by loving where we once hated.
I think this is about the best starting point for building up the Dream of God; A boy named Camden asked New England Patriot quarterback Tom Brady at a press Q&A in Atlanta what we should do about haters. “What do we do about the haters? We love ‘em,” said Brady. “We love them back because we don’t hate back.” There it is…a glimmer of a friendly world of friendly folk beneath a friendly sky.
The Roadmap to Compassionate Action
“We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become”
St. Clare of Assisi
Self-help teachers have been floating the clichés that we need to ‘love ourselves first’ and ‘take care of ourselves first’ before we can love or help others. This easy wisdom is just too easy. And perhaps it is more a symptom of our tendency to narcissism rather than a guide to furthering compassionate action.
St. Clare and St. Francis might guide us to the mirror for a closer yet wider second look. In so doing, we could possibly discover that Self-help and helping-the-Other are inseparable.
The false self would like for us to follow trendy wisdom of taking care of ourselves first. It seems to make so much sense. But the false self is never really interested in extending compassion to anybody other than number one.
It shuns a deep look into the mirror because it will lead us to the discovery that we are one with our true self, with everyone else, with God and all of creation. The false self begins to dissolve when we take that risk of accepting and embracing our absolute vulnerability and inseparable unity.
You are totally loved and totally accepted just the way you are. So am I and so is everyone else. Two great commandments are retold in the gospels of Matthew and Mark which record Jesus as telling us to love God, neighbor, and self equally with our whole hearts, souls and minds.
Likewise, the beautiful song “Let There Be Peace on Earth” gives us a simple directive to walk with each other in perfect harmony. The roadmap to compassionate action is clear. Take the risk. Look in the mirror. Then, let it begin with me.
How to Crack the Negativity Code
Awakening to Snowfall; Remember Who You Are
“As you awaken to your Divine nature, you'll begin to appreciate beauty in everything you see, touch and experience.” ~ Wayne Dyer
Winter snows have come with a vengeance once again to folks who live up North. I remember how tired we used to get of scooping, scraping and being trapped inside. My daughter and I have never been big fans, though I liked it more than she. Then there are people like my son who never weary of it. His Michigan childhood comes back to life when it snows and just delights in it. He reminds me that there is always something magical about snow. It has elements of surprise and beauty that we should explore rather than shun. Within each snowfall are thousands and thousands of unique snowflakes which serve to remind us of who we are.
Our unique self, like a snowflake, will never be duplicated. The evidence of this is everywhere. Our DNA is comprised of markers that are arranged only for one person. It never has been and never will be again. Only you! Even twins don’t have the same DNA. Combination of parents, grandparents and countless generations of ancestors each give us a gift of themselves in the pattern that becomes you. It took thousands of years to come up with the design for each individual. Our uniqueness also can be found in fingerprints. Each time we touch something we leave a stamp of our existence behind. We are here and we are one of a kind. The mold has been broken.
We have an individual and divine purpose in our uniqueness. The odds of your random creation are so small that it is incomprehensible. Wayne Dyer talks about the fact that a great wind sweeping through a garbage dump, gathering up all of the pieces and setting them down as a fully assembled Boeing 747 is more likely than the exclusive collection of cells and tissue that is you. Your importance cannot be understated. The incredible love story of our Creator is at work here. Such a miracle can have no other explanation. You are God’s beloved child. Look at that beautiful snowfall and remember.
Freedom from Fear and Regret
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves…regret for the past and fear of the future.” ~ Fulton Ourslear
When the end of life comes we will not regret the business deals that didn’t work out, sales that weren't made, or final exams we didn’t ace. We will regret the squandered opportunities. We will suffer the most from our failure to devote enough time to our loved ones. We will regret our lack of attention to a skinned knee. We will long to have the moment back when our words of criticism bruised a heart.
I have found that healing begins when we take action here and now. The way to eliminate regrets from the past and to dispel the fear of the future is to fully evaluate what really matters and pay attention to it. We will put an end to the endless repetition of mistakes by unshackling ourselves from the past and freeing ourselves from the future. We can start by putting first things first.
The present moment is when to make that extra effort. All we have to do is more fully avail ourselves to those important people in our lives. Another phone call, a written card, or any added gesture that proclaims our love will wash away fear and regret as we go forward. By making time and freely giving our gifts of love, we will discover that our resources are unlimited. This is the next right thing to do. Nothing is more important.
Finding Joy in Tempestuous Times
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. ~ Howard Thurmann
The night before he was murdered in Memphis, Tennessee, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. warned us that violence was threatening our very existence. If we are to confront this reality, there must come a deep joy which springs up in the face of hatred and injustice. The beauty is that this kind of joy exists within each and every one of us. Discovering it can be achieved in prayer along with contemplative practice and outreach. For it is in stillness and silence that the voice of God will direct our actions.
Years ago, I was engaged in a whirlwind of activity with self-designed goals to have more…more of everything. I thought that happiness could be found through obtaining lots of money and all the best material things it could provide. I would do whatever was necessary to get it, often at the expense of anyone or anything standing in my path. I was 'on the way up' and those left behind were regretfully collateral damage.
This is not to say that I was a mean person. On the contrary, I was jovial and popular. And I wanted more of that too. It was all intoxicating. In fact, intoxication became part of the equation. Cocaine and alcohol were perfect running mates as my personal wealth neared a million dollars just prior to my thirtieth birthday. Then the bottom fell out and I lost all of the people and things I treasured so much.
Surprisingly, it was during the following years of descent, desperation, and sadness that I discovered inner peace and joy. My path of personal poverty led me to a different kind of richness through centering prayer and contemplation I never imagined. Faith and hope were restored as God’s unconditional love and forgiveness washed over me. I came alive.
For the past four decades, my world has been filled with an inner joy founded in contemplation and action. Not that there has been an absence of bumps and obstacles. I have had more than a few stumbles. But I have dedicated my life to what unceasingly makes me come alive. My work with wounded kids and those who suffer from addiction has been my way of confronting suffering, injustice, and hatred.
We are all called to action in this chaotic world. It has never been more important for us to work for social, political, economic and environmental justice and peace. We have to come alive now. Our existence depends on it.
Restoring a Sense of Wonder in the Internet Age
Loving the Back Roads
Dreams and Reality; the Dance of Oneing
“Stay true to your deepest intuition that an extraordinary and miraculous life is possible.” ~ Craig Hamilton
I have a hunch that each of us struggles with a sense of emptiness when considering how seldom our dreams and present situation match up. Life has a way of leading us in directions that are far from what we had planned or for which we had hoped. When that emptiness descends, a bleak truth is laid bare. But this somber reality actually contains a guiding light through dense fog. It is a touchstone.
The fact that an extraordinary and miraculous life is possible cannot be denied. It is not only possible...but is a certainty if fully embraced. This doesn’t mean an easier climb on the ladder which we are enticed to believe brings happiness. Rather than a linear measurement of success and failure, it is a promise that there is an ongoing dance and celebration we are invited to join. Life is not about beginnings and endings, wins and losses,or scorecards to be kept. It is circular and full of promise.
“The only things that can keep you out of this divine dance are fear, doubt or self-hatred. What would happen in your life -right now- if you accepted being fully accepted?” ~ Richard Rohr
This chapter of your story is being written in the very moment we are experiencing here and now. How it evolves is up to you. The miraculous and extraordinary are revealed when it is understood that you are never alone. We are one in all of our magnificent diversity. Nothing is so dark that it might extinguish this truth. God is with us and we are with God. We dance this dance together.
Epiphany; Home By Another Way
Dance of the Ninth Day
"In the cold you wrap me. In my uncertainty you listen. In all my joys you celebrate. At every turn you meet me with competence and grace. What a fine dance we have together."
Mary Anne Radmacher
I once had this epiphany and scribbled down the words that came to my mind. My intention was to let them marinate and become a poem. Of course, they still may, but for more than thirty years have yet to inspire more verse.
They came to me at a time when I had decided never to become involved in another intimate relationship. Pain from losing my marriage and children was so intense that I vowed a life of celibacy. I would travel alone. It was the middle of the night when this phrase came along; ‘Dance, Dance, Dance! I said celebrate not celibate.’
Though the words may sound simple or silly, I was changed. Gradually opening myself to others, I miraculously found the love of my life and we married. I have been restored to family, children and grandchildren. Life is good...and it is intended to be a dance of celebration. This is my lesson of The Ninth Day of Christmas.
The gift of Nine Ladies Dancing from our true love is compelling. It takes the intimacy of the dance and entwines it into spiritual direction. We are reminded of the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit. This Spirit is God revealed as the interactive dancer who teaches us how to live and love. We are supposed to be engaged in an active relationship with God and with each other.
The nine Christmas gifts include; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. A dancer needs a partner. When there is nobody to dance with there is no relationship or affection. God needs us and we need God. So let’s dance. It is a perfect day to engage.
"I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed." ~ Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers
The New Year; A Path to Reconciliation
"Ring out the old, ring in the new. Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true." ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson
A celebration of this New Year of 2019 gives us the unique opportunity to reflect. We have experienced triumph and defeat, joy and sorrow, abundance and loss. Our personal lives have been changed. We are a bit older and more experienced. Our reminiscences of the year should include both the good and the harm we might have done. This is a good time to sort it all out. It will give us a chance for reconciliation and new beginnings.
Sometimes we leave damage in our wake despite the best intentions. People have feelings that are hurt because we were somehow thoughtless or reckless. We have done or failed to do things that have hurt relationships. This creates a need for making amends. We must first admit our wrongdoings, apologize, and then proceed to set things right. By so doing, we make ourselves vulnerable and take down the walls that separate us. Finally, we pledge to refrain from repeating the damaging behavior in the future.
The healing that springs forth from reconciliation is beyond our greatest expectations. We begin to live a life without regrets. Trust and harmony become the cornerstones of our relationships. We find ourselves as the benefactors and recipients of love and compassion. We build coalitions instead of seeking isolation. Diversity is no longer frightening. There is always a path to reconciliation. Nothing is so important that it should stand in the way of this miraculous process. What a terrific way to turn the page to a new year. Let’s do it...and set the stage for a Happy New Year.
“Le present est gros de l'avenir.” (The present is big with the future) ~ French Proverb
The Second Day of Christmas; Saint Stephen’s Day
“Instead of being a time of unusual behavior, Christmas is perhaps the only time in the year when people can obey their natural impulses and express their true sentiments without feeling self-conscious and, perhaps, foolish. Christmas, in short, is about the only chance a man has to be himself.” ~ Francis C. Farley
The Second Day of Christmas is the one that reminds us of unconditional love and perfect dedication. It is the feast day of St. Stephen. We are reminded that love overcomes hatred as evidenced by his legacy left which somewhat troubles the hearts and souls of those who are filled with malice and malcontent. That gift of love left by Stephen haunted his persecutor, Saul of Tarsus, until he could stand it no more. On a dusty road, he saw the light and was forever converted. St. Paul cleared the way for all of us to follow. Love triumphs, Love wins, Love endures.
What a message we receive in these days of Christmas celebration! There is an urge to get it all over with, to pack up the decorations, put away the presents, clean up the mess, and to resume the day-to-day routines. How about if we summon the spirit to resist that temptation right now? Two turtle doves are the symbol of this second day of Christmas. It is the perfect opportunity to think about those little loving creatures who dedicate their entire lives to each other. They are little signs of God’s love; a love which makes no demands and asks no favors and has no strings attached. Think of how unlike that our regular, busy or hum-drum days can be. We require performance from each other. We expect returns for what we give. We keep step with an invisible and arduous drummer telling us to be worthy.
I stand against trying to put Christmas back into storage bins and boxes. Give it up! Settle into the 12 Days and receive a new way of living out the love which is given so freely. Perhaps, even after two thousand years, St.Stephen and St. Paul have personally left each of us with a cleared the way that we might navigate life differently.
The Christmas Fire
Gifts of The Wonderful
“The main trouble is there are too many people who don't know where they're going and they want to get there too fast!”
Sylvester (The Bishop’s Wife, 1947)
I’m waiting for The Wonderful.
It’s coming as sure as there will be white Christmases, holiday decorations, familiar old songs, eggnog, stuffed stockings and presents under the tree. Many of us have the luxury of fond memories, enticing smells of things cooking and a landscape that twinkles with a thousand lights to remind us. Some have not been as fortunate.
But we must remember that there is more to Christmas than the things we might receive and give. I have come to call it The Wonderful. It has to do with a marvelous transformation that seems to happen to people this time of the year. Waiting for The Wonderful creates an atmosphere of childlike joy. The possibility of a miracle reigns supreme. Something extraordinary is coming as our waiting takes on a joy of its’ own.
Christmas movies always put me ‘in the mood’ for the coming festivities. Among my favorites are old black and whites from post-World War II. The men and women who had been engaged in devastating struggles of battle were back home and in the process of creating a bold new world. They rolled up their sleeves, went to work, built houses, attended schools, and dreamed dreams of prosperity.
By 1947, the simple times and ways of a Norman Rockwell agri-rural America were forever altered. Along with the many changes came a more bountiful and materialistic focus on Christmas. Presents were stacked under lighted trees instead of hung on branches. More became better…and that notion was reflected in the movies.
Two very different films were presented that year. One was ‘Miracle on 34th Street’ which portrayed the Macys parade and an abundance of shopping. The other was ‘The Bishop’s Wife’ which reminded a hurried nation to slow it down and to think about what our Christmas observance was all about. This picture sums up the essence of The Wonderful. It ended with a Bishop’s sermon written by an angel. This is what he said;
“Tonight I want to tell you the story of an empty stocking. Once upon a midnight clear, there was a child's cry. A blazing star hung over a stable and wise men came with birthday gifts. We haven't forgotten that night down the centuries; we celebrate it with stars on Christmas trees, the sound of bells and with gifts. But especially with gifts.
You give me a book; I give you a tie. Aunt Martha has always wanted an orange squeezer and Uncle Henry could do with a new pipe. We forget nobody, adult or child. All the stockings are filled...all that is, except one. And we have even forgotten to hang it up.
The stocking for the child born in a manger. It's his birthday we are celebrating. Don't ever let us forget that. Let us ask ourselves what he would wish for most... and then let each put in his share. Loving-kindness, warm hearts and the stretched out hand of tolerance. All the shining gifts that make peace on earth.”
Today, amid all the hustle and bustle, I will remember to fill a stocking in my heart with the most important gift of all. I will eagerly welcome The Wonderful.
Rejoice, Rejoice; The Season of Light is Beckoning
“There is not one blade of grass, there is no color in this world that is not intended to make us rejoice.”
John Calvin
This Sunday in Advent asks for us to rejoice in the season. We can see the changes wherever we go during Christmastime. Colored and white twinkle lights adorn trees, houses, barns...and even gaily displayed on a whole group of people in Pelzer, South Carolina. What a delight it is to be surrounded by the joy of light and lights. Today implores us to be mindful. It asks for us to join hands in an effort to make the world a gentler place of rejoicing. What better time than now to start a journey of healing and awakening? We have the light to guide us just as the Wise Men did more than two thousand years ago.
All of this incredible celebration is shining into our hearts on Gaudete Sunday. But I want to share another kind of rejoicing that has touched me deeply. I have had the great honor and privilege of listening to the “Fifth Step” of people recovering from the chronic diseases of addiction. When one arrives at this point, a fearless moral inventory has been painstakingly prepared. Resentments have been identified. Even personal ownership in those offenses has been taken. A lifetime of secrets is shared and confessed. Burdens are set aside. A place is made for rejoicing where depression and regret once reigned. From the heart of darkness comes a beacon of hope.
I have learned from these brave people that light, love, and joy can glow in the most hopeless situations. I have learned that healing and awakening are always possible. I have learned that we are never alone. I have learned that we are all in this together for a very good reason. I have learned that Christmas rejoicing can happen every day of the year if we allow it. That transformation is just what we need today.
"I don't know what to do!" cried Scrooge, laughing and crying in the same breath; and making a perfect Laocoon of himself with his stockings. "I am as light as a feather, I am as happy as an angel, I am as merry as a schoolboy. I am as giddy as a drunken man."
Charles Dickens
Embracing Faith; The Mystical, Magical Flight of Christmas
“I love the recklessness of faith. First you leap, and then you grow wings.” ~ William Sloane Coffin
One of the magical messages of Christmas which we are asked to explore during Advent is that faith, like love, is here regardless of our willingness to recognize it. We don’t have to trust this...and we don’t even have to believe it. In fact, we don’t have to do anything. Faith is just there regardless of our acceptance.
Words of the poet Rilke sweep over me and fill me with wonder when he says that in faith “there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.”
The mystical wisdom of Jesus who compares faith to a mustard seed boggles my mind. The tiniest little seed was planted in each of us. And it has the capacity to move mountains. How could it be that our faith which seems so fleeting and fragile is so ever-present and strong? Perhaps because it never really leaves us.
Our always-possessed faith whispers the truth to us that darkness can never endure. It proves over and over that good will overcome evil. It brings love forward and casts hatred aside. It dispels worry and asks us to simply do the-next-right-thing. We are not meant to understand faith. This isn't necessary and perhaps not even possible. Just take the leap. Your wings will appear and provide a magnificent flight. Everything will be okay.
Have Some Faith; A Message of the Christmas Season
I know you want to question everything, but sometimes it pays to just have a little faith.”
Lauren Kate
Our senses are bombarded with stories of conversions and restoration of faith during Advent and Christmastime.
The tales have been woven into the fabric of our culture beginning on Thanksgiving with “The Miracle on 34th Street” and continue to infuse us for the next days and weeks until The Wonderful finally arrives on Christmas Day. Most all of us have seen these movies dozens of times.
Yet, the hard-hearted becoming soft and compassionate, the miser becoming generous, and the troubled being saved, always seem to find a way of evoking sentimental feelings. The reason is, of course, that this is the heart of our Christmas experience. We are all hoping that we will be better people and that the world will become a kinder place.
The 2nd Sunday of Advent symbolizes Faith. One of the stories that always moves me is that of Saint Therese of France who had an incredible awakening in 1886 at age 14. A simple thing had happened. She had reached an age when the Christmas tradition of leaving her shoes by the fireplace in anticipation of presents was at an end.
She completed the ritual with her parents after which she heard her father exclaim that he was thankful they would never have to do it again. She began weeping, but the sadness was replaced by an incredible ‘white-light’ experience in which she was given a message of conversion by God. The rest of her life became a testimony of Christmas which brought major changes to the Catholic Church.
Christmas conversion and resilience of faithresonates deeply because, as Saint Therese shows us, the grace of God is alwaysat work. It is the lesson at the heartof The Wonderful. In the ordinary, warmearthiness of a stable God is born and new life comes to the earth.